Thursday, August 28, 2014

Top Hacks for the Lazy Person

#1 The bus stalling hack

When you are too lazy to run to the bus that you could catch if you actually took the effort to increase your pace - make eye contact with the driver and frown and huff-and-puff and move your hands really fast and still walk at your normal pace. It works like a charm if used sparingly and run like an idiot.

#2 The skip chores hack

When you are home and all you want to do is see TV and sleep on the couch but you have 27 and a half a dozen chores to complete, yawn and say you're tired in the most convincing manner possible. It does get postponed a few hours, until you finish that Sandra Bullock movie.

#3 The clean your room routine

The trick to being lazy and still living in an inhabitable space lies in one thing - what the eye can't see, the world doesn't know. For example, my hostel room has a cupboard, bed and table. If I have created a pyramid of junk on bed - it shall be displaced to the table when I sleep and then progressively to the cupboard when I wake up. It will be eventually cleared because somewhere in my system my father's strict discipline is still resident.

#4 Getting others to do stuff for you

People think am a nice, helpful person because I'm naturally so. Maybe. But one of the biggest perks of being helpful is getting small favours ;) There you go, I'm not a saint :-P

#5 Doing homework

All lazy people are like this. We are meticulous planners. We have every single day planned for homework/exam. Don't be fooled, that is simply our intelligent excuse to procrastinate actually doing work!

#6 When you need to buy something

Nobody has time to do groceries. Wait till thy neighbour asks "Can I get you anything?" ;)

#7 When you are too lazy to blog
Blog about laziness!!!

Statutory Warning - Being lazy continually is hazardous to health and work. Moderate addiction will require stamina and adrenaline to get work done on time.

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